is my breast cancer essay good?
Many men and women suffer from breast cancer. Breast cancer is a hereditary disease in which cells divide in an uncontrollably way in the breast. Men are less likely to get it than women. In fact every women is in risk of this disease.
One of the things that can cause this disease is having an early menstruation. Having a member of the family with this disease can cause breast cancer as well. Another cause of this disease is growing older. You might want to check your diet closely because having a high fat diet causes cancer too.
There are many preventions to breast cancer like eating healthy food or exercising. Having a mammogram can?t prevent it but if you do this every year the doctors can detect if you have breast cancer at an early time which is good. You can also prevent breast cancer by avoiding alcohol. Also every time you buy deodorant check that it is aluminum-free. Remember that even tough you do all this things you still have a minor risk of getting breast cancer.
The treatments for breast cancer are many but they depend on how bad the patient is. One of the most common is the chemotherapy. Radiation is a common treatment too.
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Remember breast cancer can be very harmful or it can be almost nothing but it is important for you to know the causes preventions and treatments of it. Just remember to have a healthy life and you might survive!
should i change something?
sorry its soo long
Answer by AZ122
very good but if it is supposed to be a five paragraph essay not just an essay about it, try making the paragraphs more equal. especially the last two. They have the ideas needed in a paragrpah, just elaborate more.
Answer by truefirstedition
Some of your information is inaccurate. For example, having early menstruation does not cause breast cancer, but it can be a risk factor (one does not cause the other, but they are related because breast cancer is often triggered by hormones). Having a family member with breast cancer doesn?t CAUSE breast cancer, but it?s a risk factor. You need to be careful about what you?re saying.
Also, breast cancer is not genetic. Some breast cancers (there is more than one kind) have a hereditary component, some don?t.
Finally, your essay is really vague. If you want to impress your teacher, do a little research. How many people are affected by breast cancer each year? What kinds of chemotherapy treatments are there? A really important one, Herceptin, was developed just a few years ago. How many people die from breast cancer annually? Are the rates going up or down?
Your writing is fine but you need to pay close attention to the ?facts? that you are presenting. The link below is to Cancer.Net, which has oncologist-approved information for cancer patients and survivors.
Answer by Crystal V
Yes, you have a very good essay. I?ve learned a few things about breast cancer from your essay. It?s VERY Informative. I?m sorry to tell you this, but to tell you the truth, you made a mistake in paragraph 3. You typed, ?but even tough?.., ?when its supposed to be ?though?. Very Good otherwise. To tell you the truth, I thought that us women were more in risk of the breast cancer since we have the breasts. I never thought of it as our genetics.
Answer by redirishactress
Verry impressive!!
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Source: http://www.breastcancersurvival.info/breast-cancer/is-my-breast-cancer-essay-good.html
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